Friday, March 11, 2011

Claire is Eleven

Claire turned eleven years old on March 11, 2011. I have been sitting on this blog post since that day, not sure what I want to say about it. There are so many emotions wrapped up in watching your child get older and approach adulthood.

I am sad to see her grow up, but at the same time happy to see her blossoming into such an incredible person. Frustrated with her as often as I am utterly speechless over how amazing she is. There is also that need to address my own mortality because no matter how hard I try to take it all in and cherish every moment, it is just all going by so quickly.

Claire is definitely what you would call an old soul. She has been around the block and lived at least one other lifetime (no stick licking for this girl). I am not sure what she is supposed to learn this time, but part of it has to be dealing with me, an obviously brand new soul. I have countless worries like:
  • OMG, she is eleven!!
  • Did I teach her enough those 1st eleven years?
  • What if I missed something?
  • Can I have a do over? Lord knows I could use a few. No? SHIT!!! I hope I have it sort of right so far.
  • At least she knows all her body parts and can count to 100 right????

I do, however, have great back up with my Mom in my corner because she has had an eleven year old girl twice AND SURVIVED!!!

So, Claire and her whole family are moving on to the age of 12, whether we are all ready or not. We have puberty to get through with it's mood swings and tampons. We have boys ahead of us that are currently of little interest, but I know are just lurking around the corner. Fights over the TV and whether or not she has done her chores will turn into arguments over curfews and how long she has been on the phone. There will be tears, tantrums and slamming doors. I hope that there will also be long talks, laughs and more incredible amazement. I think we are ready so, we will all move forward with strong conviction, back up and a box of Kleenex. Well, maybe a more than one box.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

A Day of Reflection and Thanks

Today is the six year anniversary of the day my friend lost her brother in the most devastating and public way. I sent her my love and hugs on Facebook and sympathized with her from a distance, but I don't understand her pain and I am so fortunate that I have no idea what she is going through.

The only people that I have lost are my grandparents and although that was devastating at the time, I have moved on without scars. I can't even imagine not being able to pick up the phone and talk to my sister or my parents whenever I want. Could I move on from losing any of them? Could I get out of bed and put one foot in front of the other? I honestly don't know.

So, I am thankful that I don't have to deal with Kalhanie's pain today. That I get to just spend the evening with Claire at Starbucks conquering grade 5 math and that I can phone my Mom on the way home to discuss her quest for Roughrider green salt and pepper shakers and tell her that I love her.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011


Today it was -33 when I was driving to work. Over the weekend we got another 4 inches of snow resulting in me getting stuck in my driveway and spending my Monday evening getting unstuck. Thank you to Faron and Garth who came and finally pushed me out and then helped push my dead quad back to the garage. Thank you to Carlam for talking me down off the ledge when I called him on my cell phone, completely hysterical, sitting in my van, stuck in my driveway. I am soooo over winter. I need a break from it all together. I am tired of buying wood to heat my house, I am tired of helping my poor old girl, Flynn, into the house when she freezes up in the yard and I am tired of cleaning up dog pee on my kitchen floor because my poor old Flynn just can't bear to go out in this shitty weather. I am tired of freezing when I go to bed and freezing when I get up in the morning.

I know that there are many of you fellow Canadians who feel the same so, I thought that today I would share some of my favorite pics from last summer to show us all that there is hope and that there is warmer weather around some distant corner, somewhere.

a stack of rainbow bees at Pride Day in Edmonton, Alberta

Water Lilies in Riding Mountain National Park, Manitoba

A copilot at the drag races in Fairview, Alberta

Daniel and Claire swinging at Big Sky Montana

Daniel hanging on to a dino tail in southern Alberta

My dear friend, Christie

Claire sitting on that Dino in southern Alberta.

Conducting traffic at the Fairview, Alberta drag races

And my favourite summer picture from 2010 was taken by
Claire of her cousin Jorja. She just personifies summer in this shot.


Maggie was an amazing dog. She had personality. She was a Diva. She was loved.

The following is the post that Sue, Maggie's Mom, sent me after she crossed the Rainbow Bridge on January 7, 2011.

Airborn Magic raced into our hears and Maggie filled our lives with incredible laughter and joy. Yesterday, she lost her vinal battle with lymphoma and crossed the bridge to join her brother, Caine, and the many other wonderful grays who have passed before her.

You have my heart, Maggie. Race with it!

I have sometimes thought of the final cause of dogs having such short lives and I am quite satisfied it is in compassion to the human race; for if we suffer so much in losing a dog after an acquaintance of ten or twelve years, what would it be if they were to live double that time?
Sir Walter Scott

I first met Maggie when she was fresh off the track at the tender age of 3 when she came to be fostered at my place in Red Deer in March of 2004. We loved her right from the beginning. The following picture is of her in her xpen in my livingroom. She LOVED to collect toys (be they kid or dog) and pretty much anything else she could get jammed in that pen. I was so very happy for her when she found her forever home with Sue and her family and so sad that I had to let her go. I did not know when I dropped her off that day that I would see her often as Sue would become a fellow volunteer for Chinook Winds. I had the pleasure of watching her "tell" the newbies that showed up in her yard, the rules, I had the pleasure of watching her turn on the charm at more than one Meet and Greet and I had the pleasure of seeing her grow old as a happy, settled retired racer.
She wasn't mine, but she had a piece of my heart. God speed, Maggie.